Why are Christmas cards (or even Holiday cards for that matter) just so darn irksome to get done? As a writer, I love the chance to spin a yarn (or even put the spin on my family's otherwise averagely boring life) for the sake of some card reading yuks. As a student of human nature, I LOVE seeing whose cards arrive first; who even bothers to add an element of personal touch to an otherwise "automated card" (an "XO" on a personalized card accompanied by pre-printed address and return labels for instance) and ESPECIALLY the humor and insights embedded in even the most serious and trophy-studded "Holiday Letters" (e.g. "This year was an exceptional one for Jimmy's businesses as he became #1 salesperson (again!) and was promoted to VP!! We are SO proud of Susie for garnering the lead in the Nutcracker. After her broken ankle at the championship soccer game this fall we thought she might NEVER play again! And little Bobby continues to be a delight, excelling in math and Latin-taking high school courses even as he enters 4th grade (a half year early!). I have just redecorated the house in this season's colors and the guest room is ready should anyone want to come visit us at our Alta retreat! :o) ") GAG!
So with all this good fodder, why is it so hard to actually get the darn things in the mail? From my perspective, I want to use this time for a personal (albeit one sided) connection with these friends--some of whom I have not connected with since last year this time (give or take a month or two!!). And yes, that is a whole 'nother form of friendship and holiday dysfunction, rolled in one, but no time to discuss that now!
Do I expect too much as a writer from this annual holiday outreach? Am I looking for reader feedback? Am I looking for human interaction? Is it not enough for me to sit at the table and think good thoughts towards my friends and not glean a reaction? Ahhh, the trauma of it all.
And now, back to card writing, before January 1st comes.
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5 comments:
Ah, the aptly named, Brag Rag. I've sent out a few before realizing how gauche they are. "Since I really have no interest in your life whatsoever, I have to assume you are interested in mine. Therefore, yes, I have accomplished so very much this year - as opposed to last year when I neglected to send you a card at all - and I wanted to point out how very happy and successful I am and more importantly how much more happy and successful I am than are you. Merry Christmas."
The problem isn't really Christmas Cards at all, but rather the loss of any meaningful written correspondence in general. How many times have written a lengthy letter only to receive (if I receive anything at all) a lame-ass single paragraph in return? "So glad to hear from you. Me too. Anyway, nice to hear from you."
Have we completely forgotten the art of writing?
I generally use a holiday card to catch up with old friends, but even then I try to add something worthwhile. This year I received vague, blurry photos of some child or children in swimsuits with a holly etched into one corner above which are the printed names of the family members I am left to assume are wishing me some kind of joyous sentiment - although I'm not always sure.
The beach by the way is another subtle variation of the brag rag - Here's us in Hawaii. What did YOU do last summer?
The whole idea of a christmas card to wish one well presumably because you want to wish one well and not because you have to wish one well.
These are my thoughts on the matter.
Ha! "The Brag Rag" I love it! It does boil down to the lost art of writing, doesn't it? Am I the only one who is ensensed when I receive a card from an old-once-a-year friend with NO note at all? Not even a "we're good, how are you?" kinda note? Has the card sending become such a mechanical process that it really doesn't matter WHO we send to, only THAT we were seasonal and got one in the mail (a goal I tend to miss more often than I would care to admit....hmmmm....)
Please, friends far and wide: unite against apathy! If you send a card, care enough to add a mark of some kind--if even just to mine!
(BTW-we have tried to use the goofiest pictures available for our cards. To wit: one year we were all trying to eat some disgusting sea urchin found on the beach; another year the dogs ears were in the kids faces; this year we are being blown off the top of the Durham Cathedral (no one know where we are though! A secret plot against bragging rights!)
Dear Friends:
This year was a total disaster and I have no good news to report. Here's hoping for a better 2008!! Hope you are all well so your success and happiness can compensate for my lack thereof.
With all due respect and honesty,
Amy (Tiernan? Ulness? Does anyone remember me anyway?)
Praise my brilliance. I have found this to be one of the more significant commentaries on the vagaries of mid-life and nihlism that is the American Dream. Clearly, you are recovering while your ex has stepped rightback into co-dependence. There is a Santa Claus EMO. He is where you find him and really everywhere. Michael Scott Holidayadman.com
I believe the world is flat on some days and round only on Christmas. Yes EMO there is a Santa Claus and he has been soooooo gooood to you! While you are healing and bathing in self discovery he is wallowing in self pity and co-dependence. Clearly, he will be in Divorce Court again. He appears to be a man who lacks the ability to man a boat safely, I doubt he can man his own life either.
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